Showing posts with label JOotG. Show all posts
Showing posts with label JOotG. Show all posts

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Song: Sweetest Love, I Do Not Go by John Donne

This poem is another that plays an important roll in "Just One of the Guys," so I am including it here for those who are interested. If you haven't read much Donne, please do yourself a favor and check him out. The man was amazing.

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SWEETEST love, I do not go,
For weariness of thee,
Nor in hope the world can show
A fitter love for me ;
But since that I
At the last must part, 'tis best,
Thus to use myself in jest
By feigned deaths to die.

Yesternight the sun went hence,
And yet is here to-day ;
He hath no desire nor sense,
Nor half so short a way ;
Then fear not me,
But believe that I shall make
Speedier journeys, since I take
More wings and spurs than he.

O how feeble is man's power,
That if good fortune fall,
Cannot add another hour,
Nor a lost hour recall ;
But come bad chance,
And we join to it our strength,
And we teach it art and length,
Itself o'er us to advance.

When thou sigh'st, thou sigh'st not wind,
But sigh'st my soul away ;
When thou weep'st, unkindly kind,
My life's blood doth decay.
It cannot be
That thou lovest me as thou say'st,
If in thine my life thou waste,
That art the best of me.

Let not thy divining heart
Forethink me any ill ;
Destiny may take thy part,
And may thy fears fulfil.
But think that we
Are but turn'd aside to sleep.
They who one another keep
Alive, ne'er parted be.

JOotG Chapter 28 - Unkindly Kind

A/N: Special thanks to AHizelm, EchoesOfTwilight, IngenueFic, kimberlycullen10, naelany, and theladyingrey42 for being my prereaders and holding my hand through this chapter. Without you ladies, it might never have been completed, and I adore each of you!

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BPOV

When I heard the annoying sound of Edward's alarm, I wanted to cry. There was no moment of confusion, no wondering where I was or what that sound was. I knew instantly that I was lying in bed with his arms around me and that sound meant only one thing…he was leaving.

He reached behind me, slapping at the nightstand until he found his phone. I heard him muttering something under his breath – all I caught was the word "fucking" – and then his arm lifted as the noise mercifully ended. Instead of getting up, he pulled me closer, his lips finding my forehead as he sighed. My arms squeezed around his waist as I lifted my face, kissing him softly. He returned my kiss, our lips moving gently at first before he moaned.

JOotG Chapter 27 - The Long and Winding Road

BPOV

The fragrance of coffee filtered through my dreams, and I rolled over in bed, stretching out on my stomach and wrapping my arms around my pillow. A lazy smile played on my lips as I inhaled deeply, images from the night before drifting back to me. I remembered cuddling with Edward on the loveseat, sipping hot chocolate as we talked to everyone. I knew I would never be able to explain to him how much it meant to me to have him here – to not be alone.

Finally.

And it wasn't just not being alone. It was being here with Edward.

JOotG Chapter 26 - Please Please Please

EPOV

I carefully placed Bella's suitcase in the trunk of my car, moving it down beside mine so they wouldn't be jostled during our trip. I reached up to close the trunk when Emmett suddenly shouldered me out of the way, unceremoniously dropped his backpack on top, and slammed the lid.

"You ready to go, fucker?" He grinned at me.

"What the hell are you doing? Why don't you just put that in Rosalie's car?"

"Because," he said, as if that answered everything. When I just stared at him in confusion, he winked at me and stepped closer, running his fingers up my arm. "We have a hot date with Jasper."

JOotG Chapter 25 - Shout at the Devil

A/N: I own nothing you might recognize, but I do have a damn nice laptop and some of the best readers in the world. Thank you so much for your support, and I really hope you enjoy this, the last chapter before Thanksgiving Day arrives for Bella and company.

More A/N at the bottom :)

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BPOV

I did not ask him if he masturbated…

That thought was the first that filtered through my consciousness, and I was instantly awake, though I remained still with my eyes closed.

And I sure as fuck didn't ask him if he thought about me!

My breath hitched at the thought, and I worked to control it, trying to maintain the regular, soothing rhythm of sleep. Immediately, my mind began to wander, replaying last night. I fought the urge to bite my bottom lip and was surprised when my hips shifted involuntarily when I thought of the way Edward felt lying on top of me…kissing me…touching me…

JOotG Chapter 24 - Blister in the Sun

A/N: Special thanks to kimberlycullen10 and naelany for keeping me sane and reading – and re-reading – this chapter as I went along!

I don't own anything you recognize. More A/N at the bottom – thank you so much for reading!

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EPOV

Weirdest. Fucking. Week. Ever.

My thoughts were a tangled snarl as I navigated the streets of Seattle, taking Bella and me back to her place. It was not long after 3:00 on Tuesday afternoon, and although she was singing softly beside me, I couldn't help but wonder if she was upset that we'd left my apartment so early.

I felt like a complete ass for suggesting we leave half an hour before we needed to, but I really couldn't take it anymore. After lying on my bed, kissing and caressing her for hours, I was reaching the point where I was sure to do something I'd regret, despite having jacked off in the shower while Bella waited in my living room. Apparently all the guilt I felt over that particular act was pointless - I shouldn't have even bothered doing it since I was out of control anyway.

JOotG Chapter 23 - Ink and Instinct

A/N – I am extremely sorry it's taken me so long to update. I'll spare you any details, but I spent three of the last five weeks traveling, and it wasn't very conducive to writing. I appreciate your patience, and I sincerely appreciate those of you who PM'd to ask if I was okay. Thank you so much for your concern – and for your continued interest in this story!

More A/N at the bottom – for now, let's get to what you came here to read :)

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BPOV

I leaned back on my hands, feeling the rough brick bite into my palms as I sat atop the low wall surrounding the basketball court and watched the guys play. The games had been going on for a couple of hours now, but I was still mesmerized by the way Edward's muscles flexed and relaxed as he blocked Jake's jump shot. The guys had all started out wearing hoodies and sweatpants, but as they'd played, the layers had slowly come off. Edward was now wearing only a pair of Jasper's loose-fitting basketball shorts with one of his Under Armour shirts. The shirt was a thin white baseball jersey with midnight blue sleeves, and because he was a bit bigger than Jasper, it fit just a little too snugly.

Not that I was complaining.

JOotG Chapter 22 - Some Lovely Glorious Nothing

A/N: I don't own anything you recognize.

Thank you so much to hammondgirl, AHelm, and kimberlycullen10 for looking over various parts of this chapter for me – and to naelany for staying up super late and doing a final read through for me :)

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EPOV

When I woke up Monday morning, I was exhausted and confused. I couldn't figure out why I was awake, as my bedroom was still dark and I didn't remember hearing anything. I lay on my stomach with my face pressed into the pillow and groaned as I squinted over at the clock.

8:48

Shit!

JOotG Chapter 21 - The Horde Descends

A/N: Definitely don't own anything you recognize.

More A/N at the end

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EPOV

I closed Bella's door without looking back at Jasper, my eyes focused only on the beautiful woman sprawled across the bed. That damn X-Men t-shirt had ridden up and her pants were low on her hips, exposing her pale abdomen and the sexiest fucking hip bones I'd ever seen. Her arms were thrown over her head, resting across both our pillows as she stared at the ceiling.

When Jasper knocked on the door, we'd both jumped. I don't know about Bella, but I know I'd been confused as hell at first. As soon as I felt her in my arms, I knew exactly where I was, and I chose to stay there for a moment before I got up to answer the door. It had taken a lot to make me move away from her once she nuzzled her head under my chin.

JOotG Chapter 20 - The Aftermath

A/N: If you chose not to read BPOV of "Helplessness and Hope," you may want to go back and read at least the beginning until you get through Rosalie's story. It explains a bit of background that you'll need for this chapter.

I don't own anything you recognize.

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JPOV

I was sprawled out on the loveseat, quietly singing along with Bella while I watched Alice play the drums. I loved the way she played with her whole body – arms flying while she bounced in her seat to play the bass. The look on her face was a mixture of intense concentration and absolute pleasure as her silver eyes were wide and her lips were pursed.

What a tempting sight.

I thought ahead. I'm not nearly as stupid as I look. One of the best things about going to pick her up tonight was that I'd have to take her home later. And I couldn't wait to take her home.

JOotG Chapter 19 - Helplessness and Hope

A/N: If you've read no other author's note I've written, PLEASE read this one. If you don't, well…I tried to warn you.

This chapter is the long-awaited story of Bella's past. It was extremely difficult to write, and I'm going to assume it'll be difficult for some to read as well. Because of this, I have written two chapters. There is this one, which is BPOV and includes her memories, and then there is an EPOV posted under "More of the Guys" that does not have her memories but has Edward's reaction. Both chapters contain the same dialogue, so I am not posting both in the main story.

This chapter has graphic memories of Bella's assault. If you are bothered by depictions of violence and rape, do not read this chapter. You can still read the same dialogue and get "the story" in the EPOV chapter of "More of the Guys."

Personally, I would read both just because I would want to read Bella's memories, but I would also want to know what Edward was thinking. Completely up to you, but don't say I didn't warn you. Also, as a personal recommendation, I would suggest reading Edward's first so you can experience it as he does before you see Bella's memories.

Thank you so much for the PMs, reviews, talk on the forums, and the talk elsewhere (I love my Twisters) that has kept me going. And no, this is not the end – this story is far from over, and this is really just the beginning in some ways.

Special thanks to my people on the twilighted thread that played dress-up-Edward with me :)

End ridiculously long A/N…

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BPOV

It was my turn to sit out, so I was relaxing on the couch, grinning as I watched Edward play. His eyes were trained on the TV in front of him, and I took the opportunity to stare at him openly. His deep gray shirt was unbuttoned with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and he was wearing a brown leather cuff watch on his left arm that kept drawing my gaze to his forearms. His T-shirt had made me smile each time I looked at him tonight – it was a blue Amazing Spider-Man shirt with Spidey striking a classic pose in front of a target. I bit my bottom lip again as I looked at it, knowing Edward would have picked it out because of…me. It fit snuggly, and I felt my cheeks heat as I admired the way it showed off his chest. His jeans were slung low on his hips, and they looked well-worn, curving to him naturally. He was standing in his socks, his feet apart as he focused on the game. His fingers moved nimbly along the guitar controller, and his gaze was intense though there was a smile on his face as he stuck his tongue out a bit in concentration.

JOotG Chapter 18 - In the Garage

A/N: Naturally I own nothing.

I just wanted to say again how much I really appreciate all of you reading! The reviews are absolutely fantastic, and I love reading each one.

Good god, this chapter is hella long. I apologize? Unless you like it, and then…you're welcome?

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BPOV

I idly swiveled in my desk chair as I looked down at the book in my hands, muttering the words while I tapped the page with my highlighter. I'd long ago discovered that I understood more when I read aloud to myself, though I usually tried to curb that habit unless I was alone.

I was sitting in my office with the door closed, rereading Joan Bennett's essay "The Love Poetry of John Donne." Alice was due to arrive within a half hour or so, and I was using the time to try to cram in a bit of research. I had read this particular article dozens of times, so my mind kept wandering. I tried to focus, looking for a specific passage one of my professors had recommended I read again, but when my eyes fell upon the lines:

JOotG Chapter 17 - Jealous Guy

A/N: As always, I own nothing you might recognize, but Pinkieward owns me.

This one is for all the awesome people on the JOotG Twilighted forum thread who encourage my babble. I heart you all hard.

Thank you SO much to those of you who have been reading, reviewing, and recommending my story to people. Chapter 16 broke 100 reviews, and it really means so much to me to read your comments. So exciting!

The title to this chapter is from a John Lennon song of the same name.

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JPOV

Alice shifted slightly above me, her weight pressing against me in the most tantalizing ways. Her fingers were knotted in my hair as I wrapped my arms low around her waist, pulling her ever closer to me. I felt her smile as she nibbled on my lower lip, gently sucking and making me growl before I lifted my head, kissing her with abandon. Her smile broadened, and she deepened the kiss, sighing softly against my lips. Her hips moved against mine, grinding through our jeans and making me moan. I heard her soft giggle as she broke our kiss, moving to lick along my jaw. She really was fucking killing me.

JOotG Chapter 16 - Courage and Revelations, part 2

A/N: This is the second half of chapter 15, Courage and Revelations. I still don't own anything. Enjoy!

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EPOV

As I drove to the bar, I was fucking stunned. I couldn't believe Bella had shown up this afternoon. I knew she had to be sore as hell. We'd been at the gym every morning this week, and we exercised pretty hard – she was out of practice, too, having not used her membership in years.

There was only reason she'd come this afternoon, and that was to see me. Given what Alice had told me - and what I'd seen for myself - every little gesture she made like this left me in awe. She was trying so hard…for me. It was humbling. I didn't understand what she saw in me that made her want to try, but I was so unbelievably fucking glad she did.

JOotG Chapter 15 - Courage and Revelations, part 1

A/N: I don't own anything, especially not anything Twilight-related.

Sure wish I owned my own HotLoveMonkey, though. *sigh*

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BPOV

I stood in front of the bathroom mirror, shifting my weight nervously from foot to foot as I studied my appearance. My hair was pulled up, and I was dressed in a white tank top above my black running pants with white stripes. Never in my life had I cared what I looked like when I was going to exercise…up until this week and Edward Cullen.

JOotG Chapter 14 - Curry Confessions

BPOV

Twice on the way to the restaurant, I considered turning around. I was nearing hysteria. It had been five years since I'd been on a date, and this felt suspiciously close to one. But…then I realized that, though I was panicking, it seemed to be a normal sort of panic. I was nervous and excited and in some ways terrified, but I wasn't seeing him.

Of course, as soon as I thought of him in this highly excitable state, my breathing sped, and the flashes came to me unbidden. I gritted my teeth, struggling to keep my eyes open and my hands on the wheel as terror threatened to overthrow me.

Somehow, I did it.

JOotG Chapter 13 - Sandalwood Songs

A/N: Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. I just made some of the characters geeks.

Any songs and other coolness mentioned belong to their respective owners as well.

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BPOV

I watched Edward's headlights flash across my doorway and fade as his car drove away before I stepped back inside and locked the door. I rested my forehead against the wood and sighed softly, a silly grin on my face. My mind was completely blank.

Gradually, I became aware of a tingling along the knuckles of my hand, and I looked down, biting my bottom lip as I studied it. A squeal erupted from my lips, and I swear I did a little dance in place. Then I tore off down the hall toward Jasper's room. He was obviously expecting me, as his door was standing open.

JOotG Chapter 12 - Wrath and Raiding

A/N: You know I don't own anything at all. I just like to play with the wonderful characters of Ms. Stephenie Meyers.

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EPOV

When I woke up Sunday morning, I was livid. My frustrations from the night before had stewed and festered in my sleep, bubbling over as soon as my eyes opened to the weak light of my bedroom.

I have to fucking know.

I squinted at my clock and saw that it was just after noon. I'd stayed at Bella and Jasper's until 4:00 or so before heading home. Alice had shot me a look, but there was no way I was going to stay. It was just too awkward and potentially embarrassing. Plus, I didn't want to make Bella more uncomfortable than she had to be. She and I had yet to really talk, and until that happened, I just didn't feel right spending the night there.

JOotG Chapter 11 - Pinkie Progress

A/N: Still don't own anything you might recognize.

This one is for all the ladies who are Made of Win…you know who you are.

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EPOV

I stared down at the two shirts in my hands, debating. I had never had this much trouble getting ready before, and I really hadn't anticipated this problem when Alice had called me earlier today to invite me to an impromptu pajama party at Bella and Jasper's.

I still wasn't sure what the fuck a pajama party would entail, honestly, and Alice had been vague on the details. But all I had needed to hear was that I was invited to Bella's. I'd canceled my night at the bar with Emmett immediately, much to his amusement.

JOotG Chapter 10 - Tentative Touches

A/N: I don't own Twilight, its characters, or anything else you might recognize.

This chapter is dedicated to kimberlycullen10 and MartiniBaby1 for their mad review skills and MartiniBaby1's request for a moment of dazzlement ;)

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BPOV

I was driving home after my office hours on Wednesday afternoon, listening to my old Styx CD – one of many that Jasper makes fun of me for. As I was belting out "Renegade" at the top of my lungs, I heard a strange buzzing noise. I turned the radio down, tilting my head and listening closely as I tried to figure out if I had finally blown my speakers.

I heard it again.